A Platform to Shout for God's Mercy

On 12 May 2008, I was officially diagnosed with Hand Foot Mouth disease. More and more blisters grew on my hands and feet and they were terribly itchy. However, I had to bear with the discomfort and continued marking the exam papers, which were still quite a lot then. (I was still left with three classes of summaries and three classes of compositions.) I believe I would certainly not be able to finish marking the papers by the time the pupils returned to school on the next day, 13 May. Hence, I felt that that illness befell on me like a blessing in disguise as I was given five days of mc. It was like an extension of five marking days for me, I secretly smiled to myself.

Unfortunately, after the severe itch stage, came the stage of excruciating pain. My feet were in such a great pain that it was so difficult to even lift each foot up. Walking inside my house was like climbing a mountain as I had to hold on to the surrounding furniture for every step I took.

Seeing my plight, my mother was worried that I could not recover by Saturday, 17 May, when I was supposed to help introduce my church, Sts Peter and Paul (SPP), to a group of visitors from St Bernadette church’s CCD. I told my catechist coordinator, Joyce, that I would like to take charge of the Divine Mercy section and the Infant Jesus section. Hence, my mother reminded me to pray to Infant Jesus for physical healing. I then started to pray the Infant Jesus Emergency Novena. (This Novena is to be said at the same time every hour for nine consecutive hours for just one day.) I requested the Lord to heal me completely by Saturday so that I could accomplish this “mission” together with the other two catechists.

The Infant Jesus Emergency Novena
O Jesus, You said, “Ask and you shall receive, seek and you shall find, knock and it shall be opened to you.” Through the intercession of Mary, Your most holy Mother, I knock, I seek and I ask that my prayer be granted.

(State your request.)

O Jesus, You said, “All that you ask the Father in my Name, He will grant you.” Through the intercession of Mary, Your most holy Mother, I humbly and urgently ask Your Father in Your Name that my prayer be granted.

(Repeat your request.)

O Jesus, You said, “Heaven and earth shall pass away, but My word shall not pass.” Through the intercession of Mary, Your most holy Mother, I feel confident that my prayer will be granted.

(Repeat your request.)

At the same time, my mother asked me whether there was anything I ought to do for Infant Jesus but hesitated. I recalled that I originally wanted to share the story about the birth of the statue of Infant Jesus of Prague but Father discouraged it as he believed that the audience might have short attention span and so not be interested in long historical stories. However, despite his objection, the story still lingered in my mind when I had only read it once on a page printed out from the Internet. More importantly, I felt rather reluctant to abandon the story totally in my introduction of Infant Jesus to the visitors. I told my mother my reservation and she taught me to ask Infant Jesus whether I should share the story. I prayed to Infant Jesus, “Dear Infant Jesus, I would want to help spread your name. I will tell the visitors the story of the origins of your statue. Please help to alleviate the pain in my legs if you approve of my decision.”

The next day when I woke up, the pain seemed to be a little less intense. However soon, the tormenting pain resumed. Then, my mother suggested calling up the doctor to see whether there was any pain-killer available for my illness. I heeded the advice and indeed, the doctor gave me a few pain-killers and some pills for eliminating viruses. I only had to take one pain-killer and gradually, the pain reduced and eventually, disappeared. This time round, the pain had vanished for good! I could walk with ease again! Just then, I managed to complete praying the emergency novena for the third day. (I did it three times because on the previous two days, I did not manage to complete it at the exact fixed timing of each hour.) As soon as I had completed praying, I could move my legs up and down to even exercise! Apparently, Infant Jesus had removed my pain! He had given me the sign to proceed with proclaiming His story! I was brimming with joy and gratitude!

Sure enough, by Saturday, I had recovered to a large extent, though my legs were a bit swollen. Most of the blisters had already dried up. All praise and glory be to God! When I met Father, I informed him of my decision to share the story of the origins of the statue of Infant Jesus of Prague. Quite to my surprise, this time, he said, “I leave it up to you.” He also added that I should try to make it interactive in order to catch the audience’s attention.

At around 10am, the visitors from St Bernadette church’s CCD arrived. We embarked on our “mission” of introducing our church, SPP, to our distinguished visitors. After our catechist coordinator, Joyce, had briefed on the church’s history and highlighted some features about its architecture, it was my turn. I briefly mentioned about the divine mercy devotions held in our church and later, ushered the audience to sit comfortably near the Infant Jesus shrine.

When everyone was seated, I began my introduction. I first mentioned that the statue they saw in SPP is an exact replica of the one in Prague. Then, I went on with the story of the birth of the statue. (http://www.s-infantjesus.org/?q=node/11) I was expecting some inattentive, noisy and “switched off” audience, anticipating that they might get bored with the story, or rather with my presentation. However, much to my amazement, majority of the kids and almost all the adults were listening to me quietly. I even got a few responses from two older kids when I prompted them to predict the development of the story. I had never been able to grasp the attention of so many people before as I normally even have difficulties capturing the attention of my own pupils in my secondary classes. With utmost awe and gratitude, I gave thanks to Infant Jesus silently on the spot.

With the help of Father Thomas, our “mission” was accomplished smoothly. The visitors proceeded to visit our columbarium, the new parish building and finally, our adoration room.

Now, in retrospect, I recall a Lectio Divina practice that I had in the last Carmelite 2040 session. The part of the gospel extracted was from Mark 10: 46-52 and the title is Blind Bartimaeus Receives His Sight. At that time, in my rumination process, the phrase shouted all the more struck me and it remains in my mind till now. I feel that the Hand Foot Mouth disease was an opportunity for me to lean to Jesus Christ for help and healing so that I am put right with God through my faith in Jesus Christ. (Romans 3:22 God puts people right through their faith in Jesus Christ. ) Indeed, if not for this illness, I would never be so hardworking or pious to keep praying, to keep shouting to God for his mercy. I would still be so absorbed in my work and will never realize at a personal level, God’s overwhelming love for me. Despite the many sins I have committed, God still heals me and even acceded to my request. I hope this long testimony can help to lift all my praises and thanksgiving to God and Infant Jesus.

Tuesdays with Morrie

Don't know why. Today, I feel like taking out Tuesdays with Morrie from my bookshelf and browse through the pages which I underlined and annotated last time. I came across these meaningful sentences and would like to share with my blog readers.

The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.

You know what really gives you satisfaction?

Offering others what you have to give.

I don't mean money, Mitch. I mean your time.

FAITH

• Abraham could not see what was ahead, but he moved with FAITH and hope.



• Move with FAITH in order to be transformed.



• FAITH is the letting-go or surrendering of your daily life to God.



• Behind the cross is the resurrection.



• If you don't face hardship, you won't go far.



• When I am afraid, I will put my trust in YOU!

(Some useful pointers I happened to recall from past homilies.)

When will some of my pupils grow up?

I don't know what's the trigger for today's commotion at the canteen and yesterday's commotion along the corridors.

Just scolded Louie for being rude to the CCA teacher, just scolded 4/3 to reflect on themselves (with Jacqui's video clip) whether they are making good use of their time, and yet these two commotions happened. Today, just as I was about to enter the Ladies, I saw part of this huge 'gang' commotion and witnessed how a few boys were gesturing and scolding at one another, with vulgarities, of course. A few of my colleagues were already there, pulling apart some parties and attempting to stop the fight that was about to begin, I hope. I just stood there and stared at them, doing nothing, but with utter disappointment. My heart was in tears. Today is already the last school day before SA1, yet they must create such a huge trouble for themselves.

Unlike my usual self who would normally go and find out from reliable sources what happened, but this time round, I'm simply too weary to find out anything. I guess partly, I'm afraid to know the truth too. When I returned into the staffroom, my colleague, Miss Loi, asked me whether I had bought the home-made barley drink sold in the canteen today. I just flatly rebuked her, "Do you think I still have the mood to buy drinks when I see my pupils almost fighting?"

Indeed, later, I continued my lesson with a solemn face. Then, after school, Wei Ming and his friends wanted to ask me some questions regarding English summary and they insisted me to teach them in 4/5 classroom straightaway. I obliged. After the consultation, they suddenly asked me whether I would leave the school or not. I did not give them a definite reply. I only questioned myself about my ability in developing pupils' character. It's really very disheartening to see that the batch of pupils you have followed them for years still displaying unacceptable behaviour. I reproached myself, "Have I been indirectly condoning them somehow?" In the classroom, most of the boys I have been teaching for years still don't co-operate and let me proceed with the lessons smoothly, so why should I continue? Dexter commented that I am the last teacher standing by them throughout these years and he urged me to stay on till they graduated in sec 5. In my heart, I said, "Stay on for what? To witness my pupils' behaviour deteriorating? I don't think I can withstand such a blow."

Reflection on Jacqui Saburio's Video Clip

In one of my earlier entries, I wrote that life on earth is a test. God will put people through major changes and even senseless tragedies. Indeed, the accident that Jacqui Saburio experienced was truly God's test for her, and she has already passed this test with flying colours.

As normal human beings, we can't possibly imagine the immense agony she has been through: the excruciating pain when she got burnt in the car, during and after each of her fifty over operations; and all the great hassle involved in performing the daily routines. Not only that, as she is disfigured, I believe lots of people may have looked at her scornfully or full of apprehension, and she has to endure all those forms of rejection. Yet, she is still glad and grateful that she is alive. Most ordinary people, like us, would have fallen into an abyss of despondence if we were to go through such a state of great turmoil.

Her noble character of being capable to show forgiveness shines out even more prominently through this trial or affliction. God has evidently granted her the strength to endure everything and the grace to practise God's immeasurable love for people at the time she was put to the test.

Jacqui has epitomised the virtues of resilience, forgiveness and inner tranquility. Praise the Lord!

Living Example of Survival and Inner Beauty

Jacqui Saburio- a living example of survival and inner beauty.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x8TFBeB8egk

Let's emulate her strength, love for life despite such traumatizing struggles she faces daily, and most of all, her ability to forgive.

(I encountered this video clip during one Carmelite 2040 session recently in my church.)

I CAN!

My dear pupils,
This is a much simpler, straight forward version to encourage you to pave your way to success.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhWIXQ4Vxiw&feature=related

The most important lines I feel are "No excuses." "Just do it!"

Inspirational Quotes for Success

My dear pupils,
Hope that this video clip may motivate you to work harder for your success!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=blouHiv5fAg

Meaningful Lessons from Way of the Cross

(Adapted from Church of Sts. Peter and Paul's Way of the Cross booklet.)

First Station: Jesus is Condemned to Death

Christ: Though Pilate acted unjustly, it was more from fear than from malice. If Jesus loved Judas who betrayed him, he must have loved Pilate as well even though he condemned him. Jesus also submitted himself to Pilate’s rule because this was his Father’s will.

Prayer: Lord, sometimes it is difficult to love our superiors. We may not like them; or they may give us commands we do not like; or they may be unjust or partial. Yet Lord, if you could love Pilate and Herod, surely you could help us to love those whom you appoint to guide and lead us. Jesus, my Lord, help me to see that it is you whom I obey in all who govern me.


Third Station: Jesus Falls the First Time

Christ: The God who made the universe and holds it in existence is too weak as man to bear a piece of timber’s weight. This is the human reality which I experience.

Prayer: Lord, I willingly accept my weaknesses, my irritations and my moods, my headaches and fatigue, all my defects of body, mind and soul. Because they are your will for me, these handicaps of my humanity I gladly accept them. Make me content with all my discontents, but give me strength to struggle after you.


Sixth Station: Veronica Wipes the Face of Jesus

Christ: Can you be brave enough, my other self, to wipe my blood-stained face? Wherever sufferings exist- my face is there. And there I look for you, to wipe away my blood and tears.

Prayer: Lord, what you ask is hard. It calls for courage and self-sacrifice and I am weak. Please give me strength. Don’t let me run away because of fear. Lord, live in me, act in me, and love in me. And not in me alone – in all men – so that we may reveal your glorious face on earth.



Seventh Station: Jesus Falls the Second Time

Christ: This seventh step, my other self, is one that tests your will. From this fall, learn to persevere in doing good. The time will come when all your efforts seem to fail and you will think: “I can’t go on.” Then, turn to me, my heavy-laden one and I will give you rest. Trust me and carry on.

Prayer: Give me your courage, Lord, when failure presses heavily on me and I am desolate. Stretch out your hand to lift me up. I know I must not cease to persevere in doing good, but Lord, alone, I can do nothing. With you, I can do anything you ask. I will.


Tenth Station: Jesus is Stripped of His Garments

Christ: Before my creatures, I stand stripped. The Cross – my death bed – even this is not my own. Yet who has ever been so rich? Possessing nothing, I own all- my Father’s love.

Prayer: My Lord, I offer you all- whatever I possess- and more, my very self. Detach me from my cravings. Release me from the vice of pride, my longing to exalt myself, and lead me to the lowest place. May I be poor in spirit, Lord, so that I may be rich in you.

Mixed Emotions

今天是哑巴吃黄莲，有苦说不出！那就点到为止吧！可能这是天主给我一次学习超越另一个自我的磨炼吧！（刚打完以下两个段落，就听到FM972播出小松小柏的《超越另一个自我》。那是我中学时代很喜欢的一首歌曲。我想这是天主给我的启示吧！）

But fortunately and surprisingly, 4/5 was rather peaceful after the usual 'commotion' [chaos]at the beginning of each lesson, and I could teach continuously for at least about 40-45 minutes, without incessant [constant; non-stop; continuous] scolding. Of course, as usual, I had to issue first warnings to a few talkative pupils and eventually punished Wei Ming to sit on the floor. He cheekily sat on the teacher's chair until I noticed him and demanded him to sit on the floor. Well, thank God, at least, I don't have to blow my top, like what happened for the past few lessons in 4/5.

Then, 4/4 brightened up my day during the last period. When I asked them whether they wanted the English remedial this Saturday as I thought they might be needed at home to help out in spring cleaning and buying things for Chinese New Year, I was pleasantly surprised. Except for Yuan Fong, Zhen Wei and Hui Xiang who expressed their wish to cancel this week's remedial, there was quite a number of girls who said that they would intend to come this Saturday. Soon Yang then remarked that my remedial had to remain as scheduled due to popular demand. Much to my relief, before I left the classroom, Hui Xiang also said that he could put aside his own activity and try to come. Thanks be to God! Actually, this is the greatest comfort of the day, especially after what happened to 4/3 and me this morning.