How can you cope?

Today, my Catholic colleague (Mr Dominic Sim) picked up the mass booklet from the staffroom printer and returned to me. He said this was probably mine. But what surprised me was his next question, "How do you cope? Still doing all this?" (He was referring to my catechism work.) It surprises me because we hardly talk although we sit facing each other.

I guess he just couldn't imagine how I can cope with two demanding jobs, school teaching as well as teaching catechism. I know he must've found it unbelievable because he is now a Senior Teacher but is no longer a catechist. I just smiled and thanked him, but I forgot to reply to him. It's enirely due to God's grace. Without His mercy and strength in me, I certainly can't do that much!

Fr Erbin once said that teaching catechism is a 24/7 vocation and so is school teaching. Very often, I wonder why does God call me to these two vocations, especially when I'm not a person who is capable in managing myself and my time well? And yet, the greatest miracle thus far in my life is I'm still surviving in these two vocations! I believe this will be one of the greatest sacred mysteries in my life.

Encouragement from 'Jesus Feeds Five Thousand'

Yesterday was the last Parish Team Training session for SPP. Coincidentally, we also read about the story of 'Jesus Feeds Five Thousand'. This morning, I happened to chance upon this story again in the Gospel of Matthew and I find it so reassuring for me.

The points that struck me are
1) Jesus took the five loaves and two fish, looked up to heaven, and gave thanks to God.
2) He broke the loaves and gave them to the disciples ... (This reminds me of Fr Erbin passing the first piece of bread to me yesterday.)
3) ... and the disciples gave them to the people. (like I peeled off the second piece of bread and passed it on to my fellow catechist, Kayne. Subsequently, each catechist did the same thing.)
4) Everyone ate and had enough.
5) twelve baskets full of what was left over.
6) number of men who ate was about five thousand...

Connecting this miracle that Jesus performed to our work in the children catechism ministry, I realise that I don't have to underestimate myself due to my inadequate knowledge or experience or amount of time I can afford to dedicate to this ministry. Each of us has to face our own constraints and difficulties in life. For most catechists including me, I guess the biggest challenge is how to grapple with our careers / studies and church work. Those who are married will have one additional dimension to add on to this struggle: family life. But this Gospel story reminds all of us that regardless of all these, as long as we offer up to God any little amount of time, energy or knowledge that we have, God will equip each of us with His graces and strength to enable us to continue to spread the Good News, and He in turn will bless each of our catechetical session and transform it into spiritual 'food' to feed the young people that we catechize.

Since Jesus Christ is our only Teacher, pray to him and ask for his divine help to transform each catechetical session that we have tried to put our best effort to prepare.

May our loving God sustain each one of you with His wisdom, strength and fervour for building up His Kingdom.

With love, prayers and peace,
Veronica

天主怜悯我

　　　林长震神父曾在最近的避静说过当神父的应该觉得是天主怜悯他们，才召选他们当神父。天主白白地赐给神父们恩宠，但却没有拿走他们的软弱，他们得背着自己的软弱，走这条神职人员的圣召道路。若天主拿走了每个神父的软弱，那神父们已经不是人了。
　　　我虽然不是修女，但我越来越觉得我能够在学校当一个全职的英文教师及在教堂当要理班老师，甚至是要理班的总负责人，确实是天主赐给我的一个浩大的恩宠。不知不觉，我已在教育界迈入第十个年头，而在要理班也服务了五年。凭我这个软弱的罪人，怎么能够身兼这两种备受人类尊崇的工作？
　　　我不认为自己的英文可以和洋人一较高下，因为我是来自讲华语及方言的家庭。读书时，在‘O’和‘A’水准考试中，我只考获中庸的英文等级，从来没有考到优等的分数。虽然自己是要理老师，但我还没彻底地认识整部圣经，更未掌握天主教的所有教义。坦白说，偶尔办告解时，还会忘记怎样念悔罪经，只好支吾搪塞。更可耻的是，到现在，我还诫不了迟到的坏习惯。往往每天早上，不是得搭德士已避免迟到，就是沦落在校外‘罚站’，等候升旗礼完毕为止。这样的一个人，何德何能能够当灵魂的工程师，众学生的榜样呢？这岂不是天主的仁慈吗？想到这，我不知如何回报天主的大爱。但仍然必须天天面对自己的软弱走下去... ...但愿有一天，我能脱离这些软弱的束缚，若不能的话，只求它将成为彰显天主威能的工具，间接地荣耀天主。

Greed

Luke 16: 11-12
If, therefore, you are not trustworthy with dishonest wealth, who will trust you with true wealth? If you are not trustworthy with what belongs to another, who will give you what is yours?

Discernment Once More

Initially, when I saw these video clips, I thought that I appear to manifest some of these signs... But now, I think it's just another wishful thinking because I'm not in the least holy at all.

No Love? No Dream?

Today, I saw this slogan on a T-shirt.

3 essentials of happiness:

Find something you love to do.

Find someone you love.

Find something you can dream about.

I try to reply to these 3 questions.

Yes, I can often find something interesting to do.

But I don't seem to have someone I love. I'm also not sure whether I do love God?

I also don't have things to dream about anymore.

4th - 6th Sorrows of Our Lady

While the world encourages us to get out of our suffering, Jesus Christ wants us to regard every suffering as super-naturally fruitful, either for me or for another individual. It's a mystical process of the release of God's grace. Jesus Christ is inviting us to imitate Mother Mary, to be a co-redemptorist.


http://www.godtube.com/watch/?v=DY7P6PNX

I'm becoming curious with the spirituality of Our Lady of Sorrows. Before the labyrinth walk during the CCD Retreat, I asked God to tell me why Fr Anselm had said that my relationship with my mum is an unhealthy one. What's the role of my mum in my life?
After the labyrinth walk, when I returned to the hut, the first thing that caught my eyes was a wooden picture of Mother Mary at the foot of the cross when Jesus was crucified. I asked Sr, "What does that picture show?" She replied, "It's Our Lady of Sorrows." (whose spirituality was adopted by the Canossians Convent)
Perplexed...

God's Quiet Waters For Me- Coral Sec

A lot of my colleagues have left Coral Sec for various reasons. Some have considered to leave before and some are contemplating to leave the school. Me? I was posted to Coral since Term 2 of 2004. In a fleeting glimpse, more than 6 years passed. I have not only managed to survive there as an ordinary English teacher but am fortunate enough to be 'flourishing' in my involvement in church activities, particularly in the Children Catechetical Ministry.

I had also considered leaving the school twice. The first time was to intend to pursue full-time Masters course at NIE about two years ago and the second time took place during the end of first semester 2010 when I was pondering to switch to another school. After praying, I gave up the idea or so-called 'ambition' of getting a more 'worthy' academic qualification. It was this scripture verse that changed my mind: "For in union with Christ you have become rich in all things, including all speech and all knowledge." (1 Cor 1: 5) For the second time, I did try to look for suitable vacancies in my preferred schools and institutions during the Open Posting period, but to no avail. On both occasions, I took it as God's will for me to stay in my current school.

Recently, I'm reading a book entitled A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23 by W. Phillip Keller. Through reading this book, I realised that this somewhat disagreeable working place that Lord

Jesus Christ had led me to is actually the best place for me. If I were in other schools where work is more demanding, I would not have been able to multi-task and perform my duties both in school and at church. Of course, there's still much room for improvement in terms of my efficiency in performing these multiple roles in my life, but at least, I'm surviving under God's protective mantle, which I truly must be grateful about it.

In my deep reflection, I soon discover that God is with me in this seemingly 'horrible' place. It is in Coral Sec that I discover that only He can satisfy me, nothing else. I not only receive God's comforting grace there, but also God's discipline on me. (Yeah! Don't be surprised, my friends or students! Teachers / Catechists also need to be disciplined by God! Haha! That's human weaknesses!) I also gradually understand His purpose and meaning of arranging all the events in my life. It is like all the pieces falling into place and sorting themselves out into a definite pattern of usefulness. Such a realisation is so refreshing and invigorating! Thereafter, the peace of God reigns in my heart and I am resolute to stay in Coral Sec because I know that's the quiet waters that God has led me to, the only place where I can quench my thirst. I'm contented.

Trust Fall (Experiment in 2010 CCD Retreat)

This was where Alycia couldn't trust Patrick (who was acting as Jesus)! Haha!

Anyway, these are some pertinent learning points:

• Don't limit or underestimate Jesus' capability according to human perceptions.
• Let your faith overcome your fear.
• True wisdom consists of obeying God; and in knowing that God is Supreme.

Cartoon Retreat (in 2010 CCD Retreat)

You'll never know what God has in store for you. It's beyond your realms of imagination!